When my head starts hurting around 5 pm and the time of my crash lately I am trying to remind myself I am experiencing a flashback.. It did not even occur to me to just try and sit quietly at this time and do some calming breathing to slow down or use the 13 step process I learned about from Pete Walker over 4 years ago. Either I spin myself into a frenzy or just find I am caught up unconsciously in that trauma. spiral. Today I am using these tips on managing flashbacks. (the 13 tips are further along in the post.)
I am beginning to see its the way I react in life today that causes much of my problems. It is very tough to see this and then I can begin to get taken down into self blame.. That said perhaps I had to react in those ways to get a handle on how much I was hurt.. But sadly lately I am seeing its actually me that can bring more hurt on myself if I get spun out or over react. I guess this is what Eckhart Tolle means by reacting from our pain body.. What I really need at such times is soothing, but its not something I ever experienced as a child and learned to give myself, but today I just held my head and repeated ‘I am having a flashback.’ Sadly its taken me 17 years to get to here.. 😦
Emerging From The Dark Night 
However long it takes, it takes. I woke up myself just a few months ago to that thinking. I was causing a lot of my own pain with the continual back and forth I was doing with my tenant bullies. I had to stop it, stop reacting to every new post they wrote, as it was driving me nuts. I was keeping myself on the roller-coaster and had to get off. It was one of the hardest things I did, as I was stuck on it for almost 4 yrs, but I now focus on my education and what I have learned from their words. The bullying will continue, I just have to train my brain to ignore it and learn from it instead, not just about bullies, but also about myself. I had to find out what it was about me that caused me to react like I did.
Br patient with yourself. It is hard, but it can be done. Soothing for me, is reading posters that make me happy, looking at pictures and videos of nature, going out in nature when I can is what helps the most. The sound of the waves on the shore, gives me peace. Most of all. music. I am sure you have some music you love, that you feel inside you. I play my favorites, with headphones as is better to focus on the music with no distractions, and I just listen. NO thoughts, nothing, just sit with my arms around myself, and listen to the music. Rocking helps too, with my arms around myself.as the rhythm is relaxing.
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Yes rocking is amazing, it’s why I go to the park and get on the swings. Thanks for sharing all of that. When we focus on hurtful actions and people it only brings us down. We are powerless over them.any way. Kudos to you for doing that work and learning to take care of you. I.listen to music and dance most days too.❤💃🌈
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