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My heart was a stranger

For so long my heart was a stranger

With all of the feeling I had to close the doorway on

I became a prisoner in my mind

And there in that wilderness things became so cold

I could not see as clearly before

How much in my younger years

I roamed about

Lost

In a kingdom of ice

But with the easing of the way in

I found this warmth that rose

Even as the hurting began

That I shut the door upon

For so long

A fire you taught me to fear

Was unacceptable

No one could understand

What was happening to me

They only saw me moving

Further and further away

Now I see how it was

But I also know there was no other way

Things could work out

And so if,

Over so many years I cried

As all the inner frozen rivers

Thawed carrying me to the ocean

Where I dissolved

Then there I also saw the dark face of God

Reflected in the face of a black woman

With eyes like moons

That spoke of infinite sorrow

She showed me

There could not be another way

To birth

There would be so many days

I was paralysed even after this

But now I understand

Why it was the doorway to my heart became barred

By all of these scars

All of this confusion and pain

I bore

In silence

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Published by: emergingfromthedarknight

"The religious naturalist is provisioned with tales of natural emergence that are, to my mind, far more magical than traditional miracles. Emergence is inherent in everything that is alive, allowing our yearning for supernatural miracles to be subsumed by our joy in the countless miracles that surround us." Ursula Goodenough How to describe oneself? People are a mystery and there is so much more to us than just our particular experiences or occupations. I could write down a list of attributes and they still might not paint a complete picture pf Deborah Louise and in any case it would not be the full truth of me. I would say that my purpose here on Wordpress is to express some of my random experiences, thoughts and feelings, to share about my particular journey and explore some subjects dear to my heart, such as emotional recovery, healing and astrology while posting up some of the prose/poems which are an outgrowth of my labours with life, love and relationships. If anything I write touches you I would be so pleased to hear for the purpose of reaching out and expressung ourselves is hopefully to connect with each other and find where our souls meet.

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13 thoughts on “My heart was a stranger”

      1. Thankyou Deborah. They say there is a dark side to God but you probably know that. The darkness hasvgems within it that most people cannot see. But wow, what a dream! ❤️

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      3. I agree with you so much. Butvsome people go through life with a silver spoon in their mouths and cannot understand pain at all. What of them? This is what gets me!

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