Breathless: late morning reflections

I feel a little breathless today we have already been up and walked and I went to get another gift for my friend as I remembered this is her 60th birthday and I wanted to get something a little more special. I found a lovely Wedgwood key ring with a floral design so I will add that to the book. I wrapped it all up creatively using a mix of paper and a lovely butterfly serviette backed with gold it felt very Leonine doing all of this and we both have our North Nodes there (in Leo).. I don’t know what it is but when ever i get to spend time with this friend I get a very magical spiritual feeling. we were together in Greece and the UK for some various times over the period immediately following Dad’s death from 1985 to 1987 and the last big get together was for my birthday in February though we did go to see the Carol King concert about two months ago too. A lot of memory and emotion gets stirred up for me around my Cancerian friend.

Wrapping up the gifts the thought came to mind that it is far more precious to give than to receive but the truth is its nice to receive as well, but when you love someone and open to that love to my mind it calls up a river or an ocean or a surge of feeling and you want it to flow forward unreseverdly . Mark Wolynn says in his book on multi-generational trauma and healing that it is when this flow gets arrested between a child and parent or other family connections difficulties can get set up further down the line. And last night I dreamed Jasper and I were out on bush road walking and as we walked we came upon a mother and a son made of wood. I asked in meditation this morning about this and it said its about feeling getting blocked in the mother son relationship and then the trunks or branches of wood being conduits for the flow of nourishing water while not receiving it. maybe something abut not being nourished myself in the young inner masculine.. Anyway it was a profound image that I will take to therapy tomorrow..

Jasper and I had a lovely bright windswept walk to the play park after breakfast, i ignored my body symptoms and pushed on through that worked I had a swing on the swing and we kicked the ball around, with me remembering to kick out from my left side too as that is the leg that was pinned into stillness in skeletal traction for those three and a half months from September to the end of December in 1979. My body still carries the twist and it replayed after the 5cranio sacral treatment I had in June 2005 to deal with the trauma during which I witnessed the aftermath of the crash and its impact especially on my Dad from an inner elevated height.. I then got thrown off my bike on the way home from the session around 5 pm hitting my head on the iron foundry..

AS I said in the last post that anniversary is in a few days time and had to do with me being out and far from home and all alone just like my great great grandad was after the loss of his mother at 12. In the dream the wooden boy was around the age of 12.. I know this goes deep with Mars in the 12th that has to do with the ancestral unconscious (Sun and Mars both relate to the masculine ancestors I feel).. the tie ups from his chart to my older sister’s who had the aneurysm are so deeply significant and were triggered by transit when that happened to her in February 1980. We carry so much inwardly and we need to be grounded in this world while our deeper psyche takes us down.. I do trust the Self and God in dreams I do feel we get shown messages and it is very important to stay open to them, especially seeing Mercury will soon be moving forward in Gemini.. ruled by Mercury.. in myth it is Mercury who travels between the worlds with his winged sandals and so can our mind which also associated to our heart and body and psyche..

Anyway I better get ready my friend arrives soon and we driving to a country town for lunch. but its good to touch base via my blog before I go.. I was scared of how I would manage everything today but so far so good. ❤ Happy Sunday everyone..