holding my own hand

I need my peace

I need my sanity

Give me a space to breathe

Restore me to emotional clarity

Please

Why do I need to struggle so

There was always a loving power here

Available to hold my hand

Why did I feel the need to reach for you

Did all of that not just

Come out of this wound?

I gave and gave

I emptied myself out

It was not sane

But it came out of love

A longing to give and receive it

Harder forces will mock me

They always looked upon my struggles

With contempt

But I do not have to bleed from this

Misunderstanding

God knows life is not easy

Living with an inner child

Not yet fully empowered to grow or know

How best to manage her feelings

So it is I will

Look on all of this with love

And be grateful that on some days

I do not long for you as much

And feel full enough

Simply holding my own hand