The following article by Kim Saeed is essential reading for those recovering from or suffering the soul shattering after effects of narcissistic abuse..
The following article by Kim Saeed is essential reading for those recovering from or suffering the soul shattering after effects of narcissistic abuse..
Emerging From The Dark Night 
the hardest thing for a survivor of abuse or torture, regardless of the nature, is the inability to forgive one’s self for “allowing” it to happen in the first place. It’s an irrational response, but I think it also helps to give a sense of control over a situation that had been totally beyond one’s control. By “allowing” it to happen, one can pretend there was a choice where none existed.
I know that sounds odd.
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It does not sound odd at all.. the psyche is complex.. It is so true.. to maintain an illusion of control we blame ourselves when it was really just the power of unconscious forces binding us to pain. To fortify this illusion (or create cognitive dissonance) abusers blame us and we internalise that when our own ego is not strong enough to withstand and throw it off.
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exactly so. We can move on once we realize this I think.
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Yes and it can take a long long time.. this took me at least 7 years coming out of my last toxic relationship.
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