I was always hungry for your love
Mum
I was always hoping you might see me
I found a way to stay within your orbit
By fitting my younger self
Around your needs
Even if I had to squeeze
So much of me down tight inside
It is clear to me now
How much I had to lie
To my body
So many times
Submitting to all of the things you felt the need to do
To ‘improve’ me
My bucked teeth, my too big feet
My legs that wanted to spread open
Just to find my right place
In the space of life
Instead it felt to me as if
I always was being forced to hide
The parts of me inside
That did not fit your image
Of how I should be
That is why
Even now
Sad to say I struggle to be free
And see the struggle of someone else
Still dying behind the fences she had to erect
To win other’ s love
And stay safe
While losing herself
My heart aches at times
To see this truth
If only we had been taught
To love ourselves as we were
And nurture our gifts
And stop all of this
Striving to please
But old habits die hard
And sometimes it is only pain
That shows us we must
Categorically try to find a new way
To be in this world
No longer cutting ourselves down to size
No longer listening to all the lies
That say
We will never be
Good enough
Emerging From The Dark Night 
this is beautiful, so powerful! I relate so much to it! Big hug Deb! 👏😊
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I think a lot of people must Carol Anne thanks so much for your hug lots of love to you and Nitro..hope he’s doing okay
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Yes, nitro is fine, so am I at the moment at least anyway. Sending you a big hug and lots of tail wags from the big fur baby
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We all have experiences, of not being loved by our own parents, because they weren’t, loved right by their own, parents, and, without the example of how to be, good parents, they are, inept, as parents to us, and, growing up, without proper parents, it damages us, and , for some of us, we realized, that we weren’t, loved right, and, we change that, learn how to love others, the right way, but unfortunately, this, isn’t, always the case, most people, just, pass the way they were, mistreated by their own parents, to their own young, and this vicious cycle just, keeps on going, without, end…
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Sadly so true.
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Brilliant Expressionism Mate
Some mothers shouldn’t be as so they are Incapable of being devotional
Why have kids in the first place if they do not fit your mold or serve value to you !!!!
Slainte
Alex
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Totally agree, if you can’t be a good parent don’t be selfish enough to have children unless you truly can nurture and support them. Sadly life isn’t perfect and shit happens and we must live on bearing the pain of what our parents didnt get and had to re-enact upon us in some way finding a way not to be eaten up by that pain.
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Very true Rawness is that so many are blind to see some women never should be mothers period!!!
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