The cost of denying the truth

Before logging on to write my last poem a news story about Prince Andrew facing more humiliation as a result of sex scandals came up on my MSN news feed. I read part of the article down to the refutations by both he and the Palace and thought how sad it is that our modern life is so full of pretence and denial. We hide from the darkness and the truth and it makes me wonder at the infinite cost of sexual repression, and of the young boy who grew up in a palace of strictures, appearances, formality and repressed sexuality… I am not excusing in any way his behaviour but I recently read an article that claimed nearly every predator was once some kind of victim and some choose to become the one’s exercising power and corrupted by it, while some become the one’s preyed upon… Who is to say who is really to blame in a society full of such double standards and a host of issues around sexuality and sexual repression as well as deeply embedded emotional/sexual abuse and neglect.

I just finished watching the first season of Gypsy on Netflix in which Naomi plays a therapist who crosses all kinds of boundaries going as far as to pursue a sexual relationship with one of her client’s ex girlfriends, while being married to loving husband and father of her daughter who struggles with hyperactivity and sexuality herself. In the final scene she is at the daughter’s school giving a lecture on abuse, power and bullying and in the middle of it the young woman she is having an affair with (who does not know that she is married) walks in and they confront each other.. The husband has already twigged that something is going on as his wife has had commitment issues all throughout the marriage. Something dark lies in the past of the character Jean (Diane) that Watts plays but it has not yet been revealed in the first season.

Today I was reading a few pages of Eckhardt Tolle’s book The Power Of Now as the page fell open on them as I was eating breakfast, he was speaking of how we cannot really blame ourselves or others for what we were or are not fully conscious off.. reminding us the life lived in an openhearted awareness and willingness to embrace difficulties, pain, conundrums and suffering is a freer more liberated one than that in which we resist facing, seeing, knowing and integrating those difficult realities.. It was interesting as what he wrote echoed the realisations I had after afternoon tea with my sister yesterday that led to me writing a poem.. This is what he writes

Nobody chooses dysfunction, conflict, pain. Nobody chooses insanity. They happen because there is not enough presence in you to dissolve the past, not enough light to dispel the darkness. You are not fully here. You have not quite woken up yet. In the meantime the conditioned mind is running your life. As long as your mind with its conditioned patterns runs your life, as long as you are your mind, what choice do you have? You are not even there… it is a form of insanity. Almost everyone is suffering from this illness in varying degrees. The moment you realise this, there can be no more resentment. How can you resent someone’s illness? The only appropriate response is compassion. (and being run by unconsciousness you only create more suffering.

What would it take for Prince Andrew and the palace to come clean? Could they be capable of such honesty? This latest reports sites eye witnesses who saw Prince Andrew engaged in foreplay with the young woman in question, something he denies. There is not enough consciousness that he can bring to bear and so he and they will probably continue to deny it while the world looks on.. It all seems such a charade, but then we may all lie to ourselves and each other in different ways at times, we may all lack consciousness in certain areas of life..

Waking up to realities means facing them and not resisting… the past pain does have the power to dissolve in the presence of full open hearted consciousness in my experience.. Its just so many of us don’t seem to be prepared to open to it.. there is sadly still just too much shame and judgement in the world, either reflected or projected.. What might it take for such a situation to change? For the truth to come to light? What might it take for us to be more open and honest? In a judgemental society driven with shame its hard for people to come clean but not impossible… surely it would lead to more freedom of heart and mind?