Untrue

You accuse me of being untrue

I wish you knew

The heavy burdens on my heart

And how I fight every day

To be free of the weight

Of my past

At times I feel the uprush of new life

The promise of spring

So long ago taken from me

Coursing through my soul

Making new life seem possible

With the coming and promise of you

And then it seems

A heavy weight

Falls again

As voices of fear

Tell me why

A love like this is impossible

And when I open my doubt

And struggle to you

You say I have ruined you

And I fall again

Into that abyss

Where nothing makes sense

As I feel the ghosts around me

Telling me

It was too much to hope again

And so if I take my leave

If I cannot breathe

Will you take the steps to understand

My heart

Or will your fear and protections

Ruin everything

Leaving me holding once again

All of the fear, blame and shame?