The practice of metta (loving kindness)

To love, is first of all to accept ourselves as we really are. The first practice of love is to know oneself. The Pali word ‘metta’ means loving kindness. When we practice metta meditation, we see the conditions that have caused us to be the way we are; this makes it easier to accept ourselves, including (both) our suffering and our happiness…. we touch our deepest aspirations. But the willingness and aspiration to love, is not yet love. We have to look deeply with all our being, in order to understand the object of our meditation.

The practice of love meditation is not autosuggestion. We have to look deeply at our body, our feelings, perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness. We can observe how much peace, happiness, and lightness we already have. We can notice whether we are anxious about accidents or misfortunes, and how much anger, irritation, fear, anxiety, and worry are still in us.

As we become aware of the feelings within us, our understanding will deepen. We will see how our fears and lack of peace contribute to our unhappiness, and we will see the value of loving ourselves and developing a heart of compassion. Love will enter our thoughts, words and actions.

Thich Nhat Hanh