Although you are gone
I felt you all around us today
As we sorted through all the things connected to you
Loved by you
Touched by you
There were pearls
(So many strings)
And earrings necklaces and pretty things
There were the birthday cards from latest years
All tied to together with ribbons and string
And then in a box from Indonesia
We found Dad’s licence
With a photo of me inside
Aged about five Innocent in pigtails
And that is when I really cried
For it spoke of how I was my father’s youngest one
As well as the unfathomable grief that came
As we came slowly undone
After Judy’s stroke
Oh how things broke
And then attempted suicide
So many painful feelings held inside
But with the finding of my younger self
Bound inside my father’s licence to drive
Was some kind of message
Of how much you both loved me
And I could not hold the tears inside
Oh its been so so many years
The silent grief you carried was all around
In the tokens of his precious things
All you were left with for 33 years
Following the rupture
But now my darling
You are together there
On the other side
And while I cry
I hear you voice saying deep inside
Just remember how much we loved
And will always love you
Emerging From The Dark Night 
It can be a shock to realise those things…after so, so long of thinking otherwise.
They act in a certain way because they don’t know how else to do it…but inside…inside is another person, and now you know them too.
Now the forgiveness can truly begin, for you and them ❤
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Yes but they were good parents Mark they just worked really really hard due to their background. And both were never nurtured and so didn’t know how to show love physically. I feel so much peace tonight. I really really feel their love tonight. ❤
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Oh dear deb, this is beautiful, I feel in my heaert for you, grief, oh my god grief, its so hard to deal with. I hope your ok now I know its been a few days since you wrote this one. xxx
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Yes It was a week ago. I find feelings like grief so very hard too its almost like a flood isn’t it that you have no control over and it hurts so so deeply. I am okay my grief wont ever be over I don’t think…. Much much love to you my sweet darling ❤
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Big hugs for you xxx 😘
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And you..🌹
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