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Torn

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Torn fragments of my heart

Lodge deep inside my chest

Pieces of psychic schrapnel

Making it hard to breathe

How can it be that such hope and happiness

Quickly change to despair

As you ask even more of me than before?

I am sick to death of riding this rollercoaster

And most of all I want to rage at God

Who seems to hand me a blessing with one hand

While putting up another one to snatch it away

Just to thumb his nose and say

Ha ha I tricked you

You can’t have that

Is this only my fear

As you say

Keeping all of these blessings away

All I know is that today

My heart broke all over again

As I just felt my being hit the wall

Screaming ENOUGH ENOUGH ENOUGH

Why oh why is my life so often

Such a hard and painful task master?

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Published by: emergingfromthedarknight

"The religious naturalist is provisioned with tales of natural emergence that are, to my mind, far more magical than traditional miracles. Emergence is inherent in everything that is alive, allowing our yearning for supernatural miracles to be subsumed by our joy in the countless miracles that surround us." Ursula Goodenough How to describe oneself? People are a mystery and there is so much more to us than just our particular experiences or occupations. I could write down a list of attributes and they still might not paint a complete picture pf Deborah Louise and in any case it would not be the full truth of me. I would say that my purpose here on Wordpress is to express some of my random experiences, thoughts and feelings, to share about my particular journey and explore some subjects dear to my heart, such as emotional recovery, healing and astrology while posting up some of the prose/poems which are an outgrowth of my labours with life, love and relationships. If anything I write touches you I would be so pleased to hear for the purpose of reaching out and expressung ourselves is hopefully to connect with each other and find where our souls meet.

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7 thoughts on “Torn”

  1. Hello, I have been following your posts for about a month. I just wanted to reach out and tell you that your posts, your poetry, your art, the links and videos have all been a HUGE, incredible help to me in my new healing journey.

    When I read your post today, I felt crushed for you. You are a beautiful, worthy, divine human being! Your heart, your every emotion, and the skillful words you use to share yourself are PURE GOLD!!! Please know that you are loved and never alone, yet even in your aloneness, YOU ARE MAGNIFICENT! And you don’t have to do anything, or give anything, or help someone else—you can’t do anything to earn or deserve your worth and lovableness! You just ARE.

    I know it doesn’t make the deep, deep, abiding pain go away, but I hope you find some kind of deeper comfort, deeper love, deeper acceptance, and most of all that you would find the hidden ember of love and hope that lies in you.

    My heart is with you.

    Love,
    Rachel

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    1. Oh Rachel your beautiufl comment just made me cry. Thank you so so so much. Yesterday was a diffficult day but today is brighter. Its so nice to read that my blog is loved and I am too and that it really touches your heart. You sound such a beautiful person. Much love to you in your journey. . ❤ ❤ ❤

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