The positive power of taking action

Learning to take action can often be the antidote to some of our pain and ills especially when we suffer anxieity or depression.  I remember being a bit affronted when I first joined a local Al Anon group for families and friends of alcoholics after my marriage ended to hear the saying ‘when I got busy I got better.’  To me that seemed like a recipe for avoiding feelings and not being with the deeper truth inside a soul.  Most certainly at times we just need to be and to open up to what is really going on deeper down inside us but there are also those times when it is most important to actually take action to make things better or fix or solve a problem that CAN be changed.

There is also a time to stop wallowing or ruminating over and over on the unsolvable problem or person who shows no willingness to really relate honestly or with empathy or true connection.  Then we are just better to take action, cut the ties and walk away.

Feeling helpless and powerless is actually a sign of a possible ‘collapse’ defence of Complex PTSD.  We may have been disaffirmed or shot down in flames so many times or disempowered by neglectful or hurtful caregivers who did not take the time to help us with creative solutions and emotional holding and the result is we don’t know how to contain anything.    Being able to be present for our feelings and contain them as well as mine them for meaning is an essential part of our emotional recovery and I have a post backed up to share about it soon, taken from David Richo’s book When The Past Is Present.

Taking action and knowing that we are a competent adult not a helpless insecure child any more is also a huge part of emotional recovery.  We are learning to grow up and take responsibility as well as to do what is needed to care for, protect ourselves and help with the healing and tending of our own wounds.  And that does not mean we necessarily need to commit to a life alone but we do need to take action to reach out for help or for healing and healthy connections with others which will not come if we just sit around complaining or feeling sad and do nothing to change circumstances of isolation.

Lately in my own life when I know I am trapped in compulsive thinking or getting too stuck inside my own past experiences or relationships, I know it is time to take action.  I can take action to recognise and tackle thoughts that may be leading to a negative spiral.  Sometimes I am too stuck in my head or emotions and then it is time to get out for that walk, to let in some fresh air, to get the body moving so patterns of feeling stuck and disempowered don’t continue to take hold.  Pulling myself away from what is negative or freezing or collapsing or paralysing is  important.  For sure there is a time to sit still and rest but at others its far better for our physical, emotional and psychological health to take constructive action.

Constructive activity creates a pathway for the soul, it builds on strength and positivity.  Self esteem comes from feeling myself to be a useful and valuable person.  When I am not constructive in my day, I rob myself of that important source of self confidence and self competence, then I am prey to negative influences.  If I wish to feel like a useful, vital person.  I will need to act like one.

Tian Dayton