The belief that we are held in love

It’s is hard to believe in love a times especially if we were never shown or experienced a lot of it.  We forget to look at a flower or a bird or a blue sky or even a grey one and remember what a miracle that form of life is and how it issues from a natural power or force of love.  I see myself getting addicted to stressful ways of thinking that nothing will turn out right imagining all of the disasters and I DO believe more happen to us when we drive and drive ourselves with anxious thoughts and stress and forget to notice and be grateful for the good.

My experience too, which was most profound after I ‘awoke’ and ‘surrendered’  after my first AA meetings was of angelic beings holding me in love.  I knew I could let go of alcohol and stop hurting myself and others with it, but there are still ways I can continue to beat myself up and not be good to myself or trusting of others or recognise that there really is a universal force of love just waiting for me to surrender to it and tap into it.

I just experienced an ‘ah ha’ moment a while ago while sitting in the sun and reading a chapter in Richard Carlson’s book Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff on not turning things into an emergency that that is what I often do and so do many others of us, and doesnt this way of thinking and living drive us into panic attacks or other anxiety laden conditions?  There may be something very important to our welfare to do but rushing it or reacting out of anxiety or disaster thinking wont mean the action we take to fulfil that need is peaceful.

There IS a state of emergency in the world as so many drive ourselves so hard and findit difficult to relax surrounded by technology and wheels moving faster but there is a wisdom in boredom, in letting things be, in taking time out, a pause or a deep breath and freeing ourselves from an anxious mindset.  Asking for surrender, saying God or Goddess or Universe just for this moment please hold me in love and help me to remember that love if I can open my heart to it, really is the basis of everything nurturing that is best in this world.

When I can just allow myself for this moment to breathe, to think a kind thought, to ask my anxious mind “where is the fire?” or “what is the rush?” and smile to myself and my anxiety, feeling the humour of stressing or holding on too tight,  I feel calmer.  And from a calmer place I can surrender and feel myself held in love.  My thinking also becomes clearer and my body and mind can relax.  My hands that might have been holding on so tightly can also open to be held.