When we tell a story we exercise control, but in such a way as to leave a gap, an opening. It is a version, but never the final one. And perhaps we hope that the silence will be heard by someone else, and the story can continue to be retold.
When we write we offer the silence as much as the story. Words are the part of silence that can be spoken.
Mrs Winterson would have preferred it if I had been silent.
Do you remember the story of Philomel who is raped and then has her tongue ripped out by the rapist so she can never tell?
I believe in the power of stories because that way we speak in tongues. We are not silenced. All of us, when in deep trauma, find we hesitate, we stammer; there are long pauses in our speech. The thing is stuck. We get our language back through the language of others. We can turn to the poem. We can open the book. Somebody has been there for us and deep dived the words.
I needed words because unhappy families are conspiracies of silence. The one who breaks the silence is never forgiven. He or she has to learn to forgive him or herself.
Jeanette Winterson
Why be Happy When You Could be Normal?
(A biographical memoire)
Emerging From The Dark Night 
Reblogged this on The Tie Dyed Hippie Shaman and commented:
So SO True…
Speaking out in whatever way can at the Very LEAST! help other trauma survivors hear they are NOT the only ones feeling the way they do.That in and of itself can be quite cathartic!!
SPEAK Your TRUTH with NO Shame!! ❤
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SO TRUE!! Had to re-blog this!! Thanks Si-STAR!!
Namaste
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Thanks for the reblog I have just started her biography and its full of sharp truths and insights…
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Hey! I literally just read this chapter with my students as an example for memoirs but also the power of stories. She is my favorite author of all time.
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She is such a ppwerful writer..never read her before but I just read the part where her adoptive mother burns all her books and cried..but she didn’t go under and that fuelled her desire to write..just loved that…☺
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Ah! If you love this one, you must read Art Objects. Blew my mind.
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I’m at the library now. I’ll look for it.. Thanks KD ❤
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I am so nerding out now. Lol I feel like I’ve been waiting a decade for someone else to understand my love of Jeanette.
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Im with you…. I am crying at certain points in that book how she was stuck out on the doorstep with no key to get in. its heartbreaking but she was so strong…. I cant wait to read a novel of hers now. ❤
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Oh! Well, if you want novel, you must do Art and Lies.
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Im also glad you can expose your students to her writing. That’s great.
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Love this book so much! And I particularly love the last paragraph of the extract you’ve included here. I remember reading it to my therapist early in therapy ❤
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Its so full of anazing writing..I just want to keep posting extracts on my blog..I understand why you wanted to read it to her..
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