I know something about loneliness
The quiet heart beating
At the centre of an emptiness
And silence
Impossible to name
Longings to be known and seen
Lost long ago
Like tender seeds that fell on fallow ground
And then surrendered all hope
Ending up dessicated and hollow
But I also know
That in this barren place
That lives on
When all hope is gone
A tender shoot emerges from somewhere
Deep inside
Like a young bird stretching its wings
Ready for flight
That wants to embrace this moment
In tenderness
Then my loneliness becomes known
And I am no longer as lonely
Though still alone
And I realise that hope still lives
Still waits on love
And births love
In not allowing
Self abandonment
To kill off
All that is most fragile
And precious
Inside of me.
Emerging From The Dark Night 
Lovely words. 🙂
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Longings to be known and seen- another beautiful portrait of the hurt. I’m currently challenging the feeling of inherent badness or wrongness. When we feel shame or when we’ve never been properly validated it can leave this awful feeling that something is wrong or unloveable in us. Freedom and connection and growth come when we no longer give our power to or let our power be taken by the hurt. Essentially we wrestle for our life. ❤️
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Shame is such a huge thing for humans but especially for those of us who got invalidated or made to feel there was or is something bad or wrong with us and our feelings. I love the idea of John Bradshaw that feelings can become shame bound so that any time we feel them we cant feel them without also feeling shame. Getting free of it takes work. I came across an interview with Peter Levine on shame last night and its worth a look I must try to find the link back. He explains how the certain way a parent ‘sees into us, into our viscera’ can also bring shame. That interested me. Maybe they were looking and not liking what they saw???
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Shame is my kryptonite. I’ve heard so much about Peter Levine and think I must’ve read him in graduate school, will have to go back and revisit. It does take work to heal and I think you’re right; our relationship with our parents is foundational. If we sense rejection from them it can take a lifetime to fill the void.
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