Finding a way to lighten depression : Doing what you love!

For myself I thought a lot today about the little things I am doing to lift myself up in the wake of my Mum’s death and other things I have been powerless over, a certain relative cutting me off after Mum died, for example.  I know if I put the focus on those things that can hurt when replayed over and over (most especially those things I have no control or power over) my life gets narrower, I start to feel anxious and hopeless and then I can get depressed and find it hard to function.

This morning I was reading a little more in my book that I shared from yesterday Making Friends With Depression, a section that relates to that place where we go in depression where nothing can touch us that has any joy or life or energy in it any more.  In this state we feel like we are nearly dead, it is hard to summon up any motivation, to get out of bed, to stomach food, to believe in love or hope or truth or anything good at all, to want to reach out.  It is a place in which some of us may indulge in cutting or other self sabotaging things that at least help us to feel something.

It is so hard to say to people in this state that there is a way out, when it feels as though there is NO WAY OUT, but as I look back and as I mentioned in an earlier blog, just takng baby steps of something good we can do may help just a little.  I know on days like these when I finally summoned up the motivation to make a meal I felt better, even if only a little while.  Over the past few days when I have felt a return of darker feelings I have really been making an effort to reach for something or someone I love.

Some of the things I do to help myself are :

Reading a paragraph in an inspirational book of meditations:

Going for a walk in nature.

Listening to a favourite piece of music or song.

Listening to books on CD.

Reading a favourite poem

Expressing my thoughts or fears in a journal or in prose/poetry.

Calling a friend and asking if they would like to meet for lunch or a coffee.

Tidying or cleaning my home environment to make it more beautiful, nurturing or pleasant.

Cuddling or  grooming my dog.

Watching something lighthearted or funny.

Planting some flowers or buying yourself a bunch of flowers.

Making a nutritious meal such as a warming soup or salad.

Much as we would hope in depression that we could look to others for empathy, compassion and company, at those times when such things are absent we do need to learn how to pratice self care, to reach for something soothing or nutritious to our body, being or soul.

I do know if you are in a deeply serious depression a lot of the above may seem impossible or meaningless to you, never the less I want to encourage you to keep trying to open up to find and nurture those activities and things in your life which bring you comfort and joy.  Reach within too, to your higher power, that source of unconditional love that surrounds you, although you may not feel it, believe me it is there, obscured by the dark clouds that on the painful days can hide the sun.   And do know that as dark as you are feeling today someone, many people out there do understand.