On men and grief

The following comes from therapist David R. Hawkins excellent book Letting Go in the chapter on grief.

In facing grief, we often have to acknowledge and let go of shame and embarrassment about having the feeling in the first place. We have to relinquish our fear of the feeling and our fear of being swamped and overwhelmed by it. It helps to realise that letting fo of the resistance to the feeling moves us quickly through iy. Traditionally, women have said out of their own experience and wisdom: “A good cry makes me feel better.” Many a man has been surprised when he learned the truth of this

Once a man has fully let the grief come up and totally freed himself from the repressed energy he is peaceful and his view of his own masculinity changes. He realizes that his masculinity is now more complete. He is still as much of a man, but now he is a man who can be in touch with and handle his own feelings. Consequently, he us mote adequate, more capable of relating to and understanding others, more compassionate, and more loving.