We are creating with every single movement and choice we make

Its almost impossible to see what the results of certain actions will be. Life is complex and so are humans and we are malleable at least this is how I am viewing everything now my sister is in this current state. She was just so different yesterday to any way I’ve seen her before.

Sitting with her lying in that room I did feel the angels I saw and felt the goodness in her, in fact my heart broke over it and it made me cry a lot. Also it’s so hollow,what she has been reduced to the room was a vision of neglect. I did bring flowers and someone else had bought roses, but she has no clothing much, no dressing gown and only one set of pyjamas. And her son tried to tell her she didn’t need these things and she’d never argued back its just not her way.

I also got strong messages from spirit that all of this is happening now is for my growth too. I’ve been too hard around my sister at times but when she was in barrell through mode it triggered me. Now I wish she had some of that fire but it is as it is..with Mars waxing onto her south node in Cancer and opposing her Chiron in Capricorn I keep thinking of the familial damage and strong masculine absence. Our Great Great Grandfather was similarly reduced and both Mum and Dad lost their fathers as youngsters and despite all that Dad did to bring material security the emotional impoverishment theme is huge. I am trying to be both Mothet and Father to my sister. I won’t abandon her. But I also cannot do it for her but I can mirror back at least some authenticity..its not a lot and I am more than aware of my limits..I will call on prayer too. As I send her all the love I can.

Right now I am just grateful my heart is open to love. A talk by Angel intuitive Kyle Grey that I listened to in Tuesday night said a lot of our collective work now lies in dropping shields that block us opening our hearts to each other. It’s the only antidote to the killer narcissism that can drive so much of the current turmoil, hatred, fear dis-ease and separation on our planet right now in my humble view. But it needs to be an active kind of love backed up by service. As one of my Angel Oracle Cards says : “When when you get nervous, focus on service.”

“To be a concretely realized ego means one is nailed to the cross of the created world.”

Edward Edinger

This created world is both a place of struggle and of suffering as well as beauty. And it is through the heart even in its sadness that we realize the depths and complexity of this terrible beauty.