Uncertainty

Sometimes I just weep for the person I was

I was not really alive

Or even aware of myself

And even lately

This waking up experience

It isn’t pleasant

At all.

What a mess!

Can I love it anyway

Can I let myself be

Ragged around the edges

Not all sewn together

Falling apart a little or a lot

Drowning at times

In high tides of uncertainty

The Buddhists say

We never stand on solid ground

Anyway

Impermanance being the only certainty

So I will let the weeping tides rise

Until they wash away dismay

I will let the mess be

And say to the one inside me who always stumbled

Tenderly

Its okay my love

Not to know the answers

Or to have it all

Together.