Sometimes I just have to be with my heart.. My head runs all over the shop in panic.. I then try to force a solution, and that sense of panic, of wanting to force something is spoken about alot if you read Al Anon literature or are involved in a 12 step program, or dealing with addiction, anxiety or depression in yourself or another family member or friend. Tuning in also helps me see when self will is stepping in and I am maybe deflecting or glossing over my own feelings.
Lately I am seeing, take on too much a lot of the time.. I get a bit mixed up when to reach out and take action and when I need to just ‘let go.’ This is coming up over the ashes internment issue and i am trying to slow myself down. Its also coming up in relation to Scott coming home..
I just have to keep reminding myself that my will is not in charge, and it takes a degree of quietness and meditation to tune into the deeper universal flow. The truth is the Universe may want to help us by delaying somethings and not even giving us what our ego has decided we want but may not necessarily need for our own, or another’s highest god. Sometimes the Universe knows better and its important to try and recognise when we are trying to force its hand and when we need to surrender and learn the soul full art of patience and inner receptivity to ongoing waves of the Cosmic Evolutionary Tide.
Emerging From The Dark Night 