lying to myself

am I lying to myself

as I struggle so hard

to see how thing were for you

or is it brave of me to move

beyond my own purely self centred

point of view

is it true

that you did your best

even if a lot of what was left

was wreckage

and absence of tenderness

and yet at times I saw you

trying so hard

to reach for the understanding

even as you were demanding

things be another way

to ease your pain

and perhaps I can see why it was that way

and doing so

will enable me to find a way

to live in sunshine

instead of ongoing darkness

on another day