Well its just me.. cried in the agents offices while discussing the reserve for the property we are going to try to sell on Saturday.. Was so grateful my sister was there with me.. and didn’t let the agent talk us up from the limit we wanted to set.. At one point I felt like eating off my arm.. the guy was so full of his own agenda and monopolised the early part of the meeting with stories about an acquaintance who just missed out on contracting Corona Virus..this is the agency owner not the agent in control of the open to inspects and the guy who tried to push me up on another auction.. I do get he is trying to get the best price but this sale is just another source of pain over what I didn’t get in our family.. and my sister and I just want to just hand it over with the best price but not an out of the ballpark price.. how much money do we really need to survive?
“Is she alright?” he asked as I sat quietly crying and praying to the angels to give me patience…. thankfully my sister and the sale agent were understanding and not much had to be said.
After we left the office my sister held me as I cried.. she gets it .. I just want freedom from all of the financials so I can finally live in peace, even if it is all alone with Jasper.. I will make a move soon maybe to a place by the ocean.. divest myself of so much of the ‘stuff’ I just do not need and is not essential to life… I would rather have my peace really… I would rather be close to nature than noisy amped up humanity, of people all caught up in their own agenda.. had enough of ego. and not being seen connected to or heard… just sick of it..
Emerging From The Dark Night 