Let it go

Some things your heart really aches for you, just cannot have, no matter how hard you try you find yourself up against forces that block you. I am trying tonight to accept the situation with grace. Its hard.

I am so used to this blockage now with my Saturn Moon that at times I wonder why it is that I was chosen for this life, when things I want just cannot seem to come to pass. I fight and argue with the Universe but the way forward is just blocked.

I cried a lot today, I hammered myself with the pain of it. Now I just have to let it go. There is nothing I can do and some things are way outside of my power to control. I keep thinking there must be a reason after so many attempts Scott and I will not be meeting. Its hard to know I cannot help someone out of a tough situation. Its hard to know he cannot help himself. But maybe this is the lesson. I have to just take responsibility for my own life now. I think that is what my Higher Power seems to be asking of me. So I just have to surrender.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.