To be close

I would like to be

Close to you

Can you listen silently

To the unspoken longing in my heart

And if you feel the brunt of my frustration

Can you understand the love

That seeks its way forward

To you

But so often hits instead

A brick wall of negation?

It seems to me now

There are so many things

My mind will not let me say

I know how it hurt you

When I took myself away

And wondered why you would said

I don’t want to think about

Missing you too much

In many ways I was probably

Deaf dumb and blind

I am sorry for being

Unaware or unkind

And for my lack of empathy

But past is past

God knows we did our very best

And so I would rather

See all of this

Through the eyes of tenderness

Rather than just drown in emptiness

Using all the pain of lessons learned

To find forgiveness

And keep opening my heart

To closeness, longing, connection

And the desire to love

And be loved