I listened to a very good reading on the Full Moon in Libra opposing Sun and Chiron (planet of wounding and healing) in Aries last night. It really got me to thinking as Chiron has just moved into Aries with the Sun just behind it, soon to join it sometime later today and Aries is ruled by Mars the planet of healthy self expression and self assertion. Aries to me is associated with the wellspring of life, that fountain of power that arises from our true nature, the sheer joy of unbridled life force rising up. It is the first buds and fronds appearing in the spring after the cold dark winter time represented by the previous final sign of the zodiac cycle, Pisces.
In Pisces everything is mixed together in a kind of ‘soup’. Pisces represents the deep unconscious within us, the primal matrix that we emerge out of, the personal and great womb, our source, and the collective unconscious which contains so much feeling all underlying and mixed around but in an undifferentiated state. And Pisces as many of you may know is Neptune ruled and Neptune was also Poseidon in mythology, the sea god or origin of being, tempestual (is that a word?) and unpredictable in his moods.
Well yesterday the Sun finally moved out of Pisces (but bear in mind that the planet Mercury is behind the Sun now falling back towards 16 degrees of the sign where it will be meeting up over the next week or so with Neptune), so if you feel a bit vague at all at the moment, lost, confused, dreamy or ‘fuzzy’, or tend to be misplacing things just take some time to settle down and don’t be too hard on yourself. Practice some mindfulness and deep breathing and appreciate the power of pausing.
Allow yourself some rest and dreaming time and don’t try to force too many issues. You may feel urged to do so though because rules of Aries Mars is in Taurus at present and squaring Venus in Aquarius in fixed signs so the urge to do and achieve or be yourself and self assert in grounded ways may clash a bit with the urge just to absorb or be related. Venus in Aquarius is very social so that impulse is there but its conflicting a bit at the moment with the Mercury Pisces Neptune theme of dreaming, imagination and letting go.
However what I wanted to focus on in this post is the wound to self aspect which Chiron in Aries may be triggering in us over the next few years. Aries and Mars as an action planet is there to fight for our self (the Sun) and our feelings as guides (Moon) and our thoughts and perception (Mercury) and our need to relate and connect and value ourselves (Venus) When it is thwarted we suffer greatly.
Chiron himself suffered greatly in mythology. The story told is that he stumbled into Hercules (Mars) cave one day and got wounded in the ankle by a spear with poison on it that Mars had left lying around there after a battle with the Nine Headed Hydra (a myth that relates to another Mars ruled sign Scorpio). As a result Chiron came to suffer a wound that was incurable but also gave him insight into deep issues of live and love and relationship (all Scorpio themes). HIs wound deepened his insight and made him a healer and consciousness birther. People could come to Chiron for advice and understanding because as someone who suffered this painful incurable wound he was able to know what was needed or how to help others with acceptance and moving forward.
Where ever our Chiron is placed (and this is a generational influence as Chiron has an unusual orbit in that it spends far longer in some signs than others) shows where that generation suffered a wound. I am part of the Chiron in Pisces generation, our suffering can be connected to a feeling of being separated from ‘source’ but I am beginning to feel it also has a lot to do with wounding from past generations and cycles as Pisces represents the totality of all experiences absorbed into the gene pool. Chiron was in Pisces during the First World War which was fought by my grandfather’s generation and I know the absent father theme of that time had huge ripple affects for my own family and millions of others.
Both my parents had Chiron in Aries and Neptune in Leo, two of the fire signs that have to do with childhood. I know the deep wound to Mars my own Mum suffered in her life, never being seen or supported as a youngster and passed onto each of her girls. Today I was pulled back to one of the final memories I have of being with her on the second last night in the hospital before she died where she was trying to stand and in great anxiety desperately saying “I have to get moving”. In 48 hours she was dead.
When our Mars is wounded or immobilised we feel we have to struggle so hard for a sense of self. We may have got messages it was not okay to express ourselves, or take certain actions, we may have witnessed aggression in parents that made us fearful. We may have been thwarted by rules, its something I have a post backed up about that was addressed in the book I am currently reading on every day narcissism.
In the chapter How Rules Help Us and Hurt us Nancy Van Dyke speaks about what happens to the self when rules or ideals of ‘right’ behaviour are considered more important that a baby or child’s true needs and feelings, soon a child may start to suffer a sense of inner frustration and depotentiation, a sense of ‘stolen’ power. They may try to buckle under, to be good or nice but often the hidden price may be our soul authenticity and a great deal of inner build up of toxicity and resentment (that may be turned against the self in self punishment or inner criticism or addictions.) Good and nice and qualities of civility are all ruled by the Venus influence sign which opposes Aries/Mars, Libra.
Anyway I don’t know if anyone else out there experience this thwarting influence over past days or if it was just me. With the Moon and Sun both forming beneficial aspects to my own Mars Saturn Moon conjunction I had a trigger that reminded me of all past childhood thwartings and it took me into a fairly dark space for a while in the lead up to the Full Moon. Luckily relief came the next day when my brother stepped in to help and I got support from the Universe. I saw that when I felt thwarted (Chiron Mars wound) he suddenly became ‘bad’ and then when he helped the bad projection came off but at the time I struggled with deep feelings of powerlessness and frustrated power and rage and this all made sense when I listened to that reading last night and realised the Mars Chiron in Aries influence was strong.
Over the next few years while Chiron is in Aries I believe many of us will be struggling to find our true power and to work for healthy self expression both personally and collectively and big battle are afoot as over the next year we see the ending of the last Saturn Pluto cycle with a conjunction of these two in the sign of authenticity and earthiness, Capricorn. The Saturn Pluto opposition took place around 9/11 and lead to much fear on a collective level, if we really want peace on this planet we are going to need to find better ways of holding our fears and frustrations and transforming them in positive ways.
Much of depression to me seems to relate to feelings of powerlessness and angst forced back inside. I know there is sadness that comes from loss, that terrible depression that comes upon us when something so important for us is taken from us. Sometimes we have to surrender to that loss and accept it. Sometimes it has lessons or teachings for us, but at other times it may represent a wake up call of a kind, alerting us to where we need to take our power back and find healthier ways to go for what we truly want and need, allowing ourselves to want and need it. We also need to learn how to surrender to grief and allow it to wash us clean and clear and not act it out on vulnerable others in rage, this is both a Chiron in Aries and Saturn Pluto issue. How are we going to handle forces of destruction? Will they destroy us or transform us? These are all Saturn Pluto issues.
I don’t know if any of this will resonate with anyone reading but if so please leave comments below. I learn most about current astrological influences by observing my own process, processes and reactions in the world and through consolidating past experiences of the transit or energies in life. I feel we are being collectively called to awaken to new and healthier ways to express ourselves rather than through violence, wounding and negative aggression but the prevalence of these in the world at present to my mind speaks to something fundamental and important, we cannot afford to deny Mars its right to assert or protest in the way it needs to for what is most authentic and genuine, the problem is when needs and ideologies and rules clash and then there results an unholy state of WAR!!
Emerging From The Dark Night 