We all need to know that we have someone in our lives who really loves us and would be there for us unconditionally. Without this and with the loss of this it is only natural we would fall into despair, after all we are human beings wired for love and connection and its my belief that it is only when something goes awry with our conditioning that we fall away and start to harden up or shut down this need or divert it into other channels such as an addiction.
I count myself lucky to have a very beautiful nephew who I feel this way about and I feel about him too, no matter what other BS is going down in other relationships I now know I could turn to him at any time and I would not be alone and that alone is one of the major reasons I want to stay alive on this planet. Without that connection I could so easily fall into despair and we were discussing today how many people can live behind masks in their lives, that the most important thing is to be real. We discuss all kinds of things as well as our shared traumatic family history and he struggled most of all as the third of my older sister’s children and struggles each day to be a good dad to his kids and deal with his trauma and emotions.
I just know I could talk to my nephew about anything and he would try to understand. I am so grateful to be able to have these kind of deeper conversations with a member of my family. I know not all my family relationships have this kind of depth but I am grateful for just one. An essential ingredient for our emotional and spiritual health is to have at least one individual in our lives we can be authentically ourselves with and be accepted and loved. Without this life can have other meanings but not all are as deeply sustainable.
Emerging From The Dark Night 
I’ve been thinking about this more recently too, perhaps because I find the Christmas/New Year period quite difficult. I’m lucky to have my mum and for us to be close. Outside of that, without feeling that person is obliged to (as you can when it’s a parent) I don’t have someone who I can say loves me for me, unconditionally and who I can talk to and feel safe with and all of that. It’s a painful feeling and realisation, but at the same time it’s good to remember that connections change, we can meet new people, that there are good people out there who share the feelings we do when it comes to relationships being a two way street. xx
PS. That was a ramble that made no sense, but it did in my head… I’m overthinking things too much today so it’s a bit messy! 🙂
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That’s not true Caz it did make sense but I think when the pain is deep over lack of connection we keep hoping for it anyway because without that hope what would be the point. You are not alone in over thinking things. I try to feel the love from an unconditional source at times to sustain me when human fails. It helps. Lots of hugs… and Happy New Year ❤ Deborah xo
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