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To trust again

unbreakable

Coming from so far away

You hold so much of my tender hopes and dreams

As well as the pain of my past

In your hands

Please treat me tenderly

You don’t understand

Why I keep shutting the door

After opening it to your love

I see ghosts coming in

And flooding the place

And my true vision is obscured

Turned obliquely towards thoughts of betrayal

One eye closed

So that I am no longer in my right mind

Nor can see things clearly

If you only knew how much loss and death there had been in my life

You may understand

But how could you

You ask me

Why are you this way?

While on the other side of the ocean

I am totally collapsing

Completely undone by my tears and so so many fears

Dare I hope to open the door again

On this mess

To all I buried of hope and longing so very very long ago

Dare I truely open my tender aching heart

Fully

To trust and love again?

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Published by: emergingfromthedarknight

"The religious naturalist is provisioned with tales of natural emergence that are, to my mind, far more magical than traditional miracles. Emergence is inherent in everything that is alive, allowing our yearning for supernatural miracles to be subsumed by our joy in the countless miracles that surround us." Ursula Goodenough How to describe oneself? People are a mystery and there is so much more to us than just our particular experiences or occupations. I could write down a list of attributes and they still might not paint a complete picture pf Deborah Louise and in any case it would not be the full truth of me. I would say that my purpose here on Wordpress is to express some of my random experiences, thoughts and feelings, to share about my particular journey and explore some subjects dear to my heart, such as emotional recovery, healing and astrology while posting up some of the prose/poems which are an outgrowth of my labours with life, love and relationships. If anything I write touches you I would be so pleased to hear for the purpose of reaching out and expressung ourselves is hopefully to connect with each other and find where our souls meet.

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9 thoughts on “To trust again”

  1. A brilliantly somber look inside the heart that wants to reach but knows full well the price of such a thing.

    Beautiful and painfully honest Deb.

    Peace and the try

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    1. Yes my higher power is challenging me a lot lately Marc with someone who is growing very important to me. Its helping me to see how much pain I still have locked inside but I am sure that is a good thing. Thank you so much for commenting in such an affirming way and being such a treasured follower of my blog. Hugs Deborah

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      1. Deb,

        I am so happy to hear about this person in your life. You’re such a kind and beautiful soul and I am thankful you are one of our followers as well.

        Peace and love

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  2. Beautiful work Deb. You’ve captured the vulnerability we feel in daring, trying to get love right. After my divorce I attended a relationship seminar. The wise men said we can do all our healing work, practice good boundaries, learn to love and care for ourselves and when it finally came time to trust another human being the secret was: just do it. Ugh!!! Can’t we get some kind of a guarantee??? 😉

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    1. Wow … YES E!!! I have never felt as vulnerable as I do to this person lately and I am seeing when I go behind my defence which is sort of funny really. I mucked up the last one by lack of trust to a degree. I could never fully believe in the certainty of their love but he contributed a lot too through lack of empathy, in the end not trusting love does become a self fulfilling prophecy…. Yes no guarantees its bloody hard 🙂 ❤ ((–))

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      1. It’s so hard but is there any more worthy dare than daring to love and be loved? Ugh, how I wish for you to find the love you seek. ❤️

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