Damaged goods

My heart is aching My heart is breaking As the barriers in my mind collapse I see how insecure the ground I stood on always was And how much I blamed myself For something that did not begin with me   Everything in me that railed against this fate Is now collapsing too What good will it do To argue with reality And will someone who loves me Accept me in all my insecurity Not use that as sword to cut me with?

I did my best But in the end it was me you blamed Screwy, flightly insecure Where the words you used So fuck off then I said When so many times I gave you all I could

Part of me knows the words were not true And part of me knows That insecure was But it was not my fault That I never had that foundation Built underneath my soul

Now when I try again To connect These phantoms All the things you used in the discard Are still like glass shards lodged deep inside this heart And I fear that if I open again All this will come out And who wants to hear it anyway When the truth is You made me believe I was only ever damaged goods