I found this video somewhat triggering when I watched it on Thursday night. I could see myself in side the emotional over-reactivity which obscures logic, but if you think about it what is explained in this video this relates very much to what I have been reading and sharing about the Toddler brain. When we are regressed in this way its harder to see beyond our own emotions. According to the author of this video, a person with narcissism processes ‘reality’ differently. They seem to have so much going on in their inner world and this is why they can react ‘badly’ or in an over the top or excessively emotional way. According to this video they are also besiged by an inner accusor or attacker who gets triggered by any whiff of outside criticism. They may see criticism when there is really none there and imagine all kinds of evil scenarios. Have you ever been connected to someone who always has stories of how much they have suffered at the hands of some evil or psychotic person in their life. Just beware they may be a narcissist and trying to hook you in if you are empathic.
I certainly experienced this with the last person I was in a relationship with who I (reluctantly) came to believe was a narcissist or had a very deep narcissist wound (but then I have my own which played out in a different way.) He would often fly off the handle at some little comment which was seen as a sign of disrespect. Sometimes it was something so petty it was hard to make sense of his over-reaction. Our relationship started with him telling me all kinds of things about his ex wife which later I learend were untrue from her second husband.
A backlog of lot of intense infantile feeling we never got to process can be one of the affects of dysfunctional parenting. No one of us has a monopoly on sanity but that said being willing to own that we are less than perfect and all have wounds is one antidote to pathological narcissism. A true narcissist never wants to own they are less than perfect for the empty self inside cannot cope with facing this reality.
I would be interested to hear what others have to say about this video.
Emerging From The Dark Night 