Hooked

Hooked by the fathom of my longing

Transferred onto what is not me

Due to never being seen

I become the ghost

Seeking the haunting in the wrong thing

That in glittering in all its golden perfection

Is hollow at the centre

My uncertainty wasn’t due to fear

That was the lie I told myself

To negate the truth I knew deep inside my body

That reason denied

The deeper knowing

That holding onto what is damaged

Was the most important thing

Because the true beauty and strength

Lies deep in my scars and wounds

All the things you would rather I erase

I sought to erase myself I see that now

You say you were only helping me

Liar

Did you have the hubris to think

You could ever know

What was truly happening inside my soul

That was up to me

You baited the hook

Dangled it and twisted the screw

With your final sentences

Next day I wake bleeding deeply inside

And it is only the pain of this hooking

And this bleeding

This being screwed in this skewered place

That will reveal the truth to me

A bitter truth that I must swallow

In order to be free