I am currently revisiting an old issue and its interesting that today the planet of communication, perception, interactions and thought processes, Mercury is due to station retrograde. When this occurs (three times in each year, in different signs of one element usually) we get a chance to revisit certain issues. According to astrologers who have studied this cycle in their clients and in world affairs, the entire Mercury retrograde transit (which lasts just over 3 weeks) is a time when we are best to turn our attention within and look into those loose threads and issues that are mixed up, confusing or unresolved in some way or are in some other way very important. This particular retrograde takes place in a Mercury ruled sign, Virgo. It is a time to slow down and become more mindful and to pay attention where blocks put on forward motion are messages there is something we need to deal with inwardly, re-do, re-visit or re-imagine.
Virgo as a symbol is often related to the Virgin, it is that place and process deep within us which concerns the way we relate with our own deep needs, processes and insides. On one level it connects us to our bodies. On another to the realm of practical activities and routines. In Virgo we need to find ways to structure these in such a way that we gain self mastery on some level and find an optimum way of functioning in the world that best helps us to express who we are and meet and fulfil our soul needs. The Virgo process of the zodiac cycle involves critical adjustments to reality, to meeting and engaging with the world out there, and we are continually tweaking things to get the balance right. The question we may ask here is how do I engage and still hold onto the routines and needs that are right for me?
The downside of Virgo is that we can over do this. We can over analyse things. We can get too bogged down in details. As a sign of perfectionism, on the dark side Virgo can get just a little to obsessed with things going ‘just right’, impatient or critical with others who don’t do it our way or at what we consider to be the right schedule or time. We can also turn this kind of criticism against ourselves. I have a strong feeling the Virgo can also relate to our own critical self talk so that is something we may need to learn more about during the upcoming Mercury transit.
The understanding I have is the before we can enter the field of relationship to our opposite or to the outer world (which occurs in the next sign of Libra) we have to have a good working relationship with our own insides, complexes and issues and we need to have set up good routines of self care and boundaries.
My feeling is that this upcoming retrograde transit which takes place between 29 and 14 degrees of Virgo (Mercury stations direct on 14 Virgo 56 on the 22nd of September) will highlight how well this is happening for us What or where do we need to readjust? Where do we need to become more aware of hidden inner processes? How well are we digesting and processing our issues? Are we getting to grips with the gut issues that are plaguing us? Are we getting stuck in being overly critical or bogged down on details? Could a more mindful approach help us? Are we taking care of our bodies? Are we recognising and sticking to a good routine of self care engaging our bodies too?
Virgo is also related to the world of nature, the nurturing mother, food and nutrition. It is interesting that since Mercury and Venus have been in this sign over the past few weeks my niece in law who is very interested in nutrition and healing visited me for a few days. She educated me about some new ideas in nutrition and left me with a book A Mind of Our Own : The Truth About Depression and How Women Can Heal Their Bodies to Reclaim Their Lives by Kelly Brogan M.D. It’s chock full of information and insight on the power of food to harm and heal as well as great tips about nutrition, meditation, sleep and exercise.
I am aware that there is a great deal more to depression than just the biological component but when we healing our inner issues it is very important to support our recovery with good food, exercise and mindfulness processes. It is so important to see how our consumption of less healthy foods may be related to not feeling that good about things emotionally. We need to take care of our emotions but we also need to take care of our physical bodies which are the temple of our spirit. It is this aspect of self care that Virgo rules and is highlighted by the current retrograde Mercury transit.
Another awareness or inkling I have into the nature of this transit is that for some of us it may bring up issues of how well we are relating to the outside world in terms of having an awareness of the impact of our behaviour on others. Do we need a greater awareness or to make changes in this area? Do we have to sever from some relationships in which the connection is just not working or is not self nurturing. This issue will becomes stronger when Mercury moves back into square to transiting Saturn in the final week or so of the station retrograde (from the 14th of September) until it clears it in early October.
As I said at the outset of this blog I revisited a painful issue that concerned my involvement with a certain group yesterday. I had been challenged my certain conservative elements of the group who were upset that I had used the F word during a share which focused on some very painful issues. This particular group (well two very conservative old school members) want to outlaw swearing in the group. They also now want to restrict any sharing by recovering alcoholics of their alcohol story. This really angers me as when I share it is more to explain the role that played as an adult grandchild of alcoholic parents. To me it feels like being gagged or strangled. Yet while I feel this way I am also aware that it is well within their right to set these kinds of boundaries. If it hurts me too much and I cannot adapt I will have to leave or adjust my behaviour to suit the others.
I am very mindful that swearing is upsetting for some. For me it is a way of expressing anger, but I guess if I am honest I also feel a bit shamed when I am told that it is wrong to express myself this way and I know not all members of the group are bothered by it. Yesterday I stopped short of saying the entire word, but later I got pulled aside and asked not to use the word again. This got my back up.
I will spend the next little while digesting all of this. I know they are setting a boundary with me, a routine and rule for the way they want their meeting to be run. If I cannot stick to it I have only one choice, I cannot go to the meeting again. Indeed I stopped going to this meeting last year when I was stopped mindshare and asked not to swear (which is blatantly NOT allowed practice in meetings. Sharing should never be interrupted.) I will lose something by not going any more, but I will gain something else. I have very few avenues of outside engagement at the moment and not going to this meeting will cut off one of the few forms of outside contact I do have.
I know this concerns my own Pluto in Virgo in the first house issues. We don’t like to mince words and we need to find an avenue to talk about dark truths, one in which we wont be shut down, sidelined or repressed. But perhaps we also have to temper ourselves too, sometimes and consider other’s feelings, making some kind of compromise or adjustment. That does not come easily to me but I am not dead set against it. I just hate being silenced. It hurts. So this is my current quandary.
Perhaps this is a sign of my own narcissism. I am not sure I have a feeling it is related to Mercury’s station today. I would be interested in your thoughts, if you do have an opinion. As a fixed sign I know I can get very stuck in my beliefs and rigid when I get hurt at times. I feel angry and then want to walk. But it may be the case that in this situation I need to make the necessary Virgoan adjustment. I will use Mercury retrograde to reflect on this.
Emerging From The Dark Night 